Coaching for Men:
Raising the Standard of Post-Separation Fatherhood
A child-focused, evidence-driven coaching pathway for men who want to do better - and be better - for their children.
Your approach to separation, divorce and co-parenting can cost you more than money.
The truth is simple:
Most men want to be good fathers.
But separation - and everything it drags with it - can bring out the very worst patterns:
entitlement and arguments about “rights”
conflict avoidance and emotional shutdown
delays in child-centred decision-making
reactive communication
fear of being rejected, replaced, or misunderstood
defensiveness, guilt, or overwhelm
pressure to “win” instead of parent protectively
And all of it pulls the focus away from the one thing that matters most: Your children’s safety, stability, and wellbeing.
Coaching is designed to bring you back to centre - clearly and with evidence-based guidance you can trust.
Who coaching is for?
Most fathers who come into coaching sit at one of two extremes (or somewhere in the middle):
1. The conflict-fueling “fairness”-focused, 50/50 or court” father
This father often believes:
“I’m entitled to 50/50.”
“If she doesn’t agree, she’s ‘withholding’ .”
“Equal time = fairness.”
“The court will give me 50/50 anyway.”
He may be operating from:
misinformation about shared care
advice from people who don’t understand child development, secure attachment or the realities of family law in Australia
fear of losing connection
frustration or resentment
pressure to “prove” himself
self-worth tied to his role as a father
The problem:
When positioning and perceived rights replace child-centred parenting, conflict escalates - and children are always the losers.
What we do in coaching:
Ground you in actual evidence and family law realities, not myths about “fathers rights” or equal time ideology
Rebuild a child-led understanding of post-separation needs
Shift from combative to constructive
Strengthen your relationship with your children
Move you into mature, accountable fatherhood
This isn’t about taking away connection with your children.
It’s about learning how to genuinely enhance the connection whilst keeping your children’s needs at the centre of decision making.
2. The conflict-avoidant or permissive father (the “I don’t want them to hate me” dad)
This father often thinks:
“If I push for a decision, she’ll explode.”
“I need to keep the peace.”
“I’m scared the kids won’t understand.”
“I don’t want to be the bad guy.”
“I’m overwhelmed… I don’t even know what’s ‘reasonable’ anymore.”
“If I keep the peace, and give the kids what they want, they will keep loving me”
He may be experiencing:
fear of conflict
difficulty setting boundaries
decision paralysis
emotional exhaustion
an instinct to placate or delay
a focus on his own needs (needing to be loved and to be perceived as a “good father”, irrespective of the long-term impact on the children)
The problem:
Avoidance and a need to be liked/loved delays progress.
Delays create resentment.
Resentment eventually becomes conflict anyway - and children often feel the instability and uncertainty every step of the way.
What we do in coaching:
Build clarity, confidence, and communication skills
Learn how to make firm child-centred decisions without aggression or neediness
Understand where boundaries are necessary
Progress parenting and financial matters with increased clarity
Step into centred, steady solution-focused leadership
Ensure that adults are taking responsibility for adult emotions and wellbeing (not putting children in the role of being emotional caretakers for parents)
Why Coaching?
This is not generic separation advice.
This is not “learn how to win” or “strategic fathering”.
This is evidence-based, child-focused, developmentally informed support that helps men step into a role that their children need:
A father who is steady, reliable, emotionally available, and accountable.
You’ll learn:
what children actually need after separation
the developmental impacts of conflict and instability
why 50/50 is not a parental “right” - and what research really says about it
how to reduce conflict without appeasing or escalating
how to send child-focused, clear communication to your co-parent
how to prepare for mediation or legal processes
how to make decisions that are protective, not reactive
how to rebuild or strengthen your relationship with your child/ren
how to challenge internal cycles of entitlement, avoidance, or defensiveness
This is deep personal work - but the results will outlast any court order.
What sets me apart from other post-separation professionals
Real expertise: Unlike generic divorce coaches, psychologists or family lawyers, I specialise in the complex niche of child-focused and protective post-separation decision-making. My recommendations are grounded in child development and post-separation parenting research, not ideology orthodoxy or bias - nor adult convenience or concepts of ‘fairness’ or mathematical equality.
Complex situation specialist: I understand the nuances of navigating separation and co-parenting when family violence, post-separation abuse, substance abuse, mental health issues, or other problematic issues are involved. These situations require specialised knowledge that generic divorce and co-parenting advice simply cannot address.
Legal context: Whilst I don’t provide legal advice, my guidance reflects the general realities of family law and I am skilled at supporting protective parents to assess the benefits and risks of seeking particular parenting arrangements, including whether to seek to change problematic arrangements.
Who coaching is for
Fathers who:
want to become a safer, steadier, more emotionally attuned parent
want to reduce conflict and increase stability
want to understand what is developmentally appropriate for their children after separation
are ready to take responsibility for their role in conflictual dynamics
want to show up in ways their children will remember with pride
are willing to learn, grow, and do the work
Who coaching is not for
This coaching is not suitable for men who:
want strategies to intimidate, manipulate, or punish a co-parent
are trying to “win” rather than co-parent
refuse accountability for their choices
want a coach to validate entitlement or adversarial approaches
have a pre-determined goal of equal-shared parenting time (“50-50”) and are unwilling to shift from this position
This work requires honesty, accountability, introspection, and maturity, and is focused on the safety and developmental needs of your children.
How coaching works
You choose one of the following pathways, depending on the depth of support you need - you can keep moving forward through the options using the navigation at the bottom of this page.
Use the arrow below to explore the different ways that you can work with me going forward: